The Office of Student Life is passionate about many things, diversity and inclusivity being at the top of that list. Clubs and societies (including Kalinga) spend every waking hour and minute striving to be the beacon of inclusivity at this University. They (we) spend hours trying to perfect the Club charter and solving the issue of exclusivity that unfortunately persists in spaces at Ashoka to this very day. Regular, seemingly ‘accessible’ campus spaces too, are often exclusionary.
For example - the badminton court is only for the ones who fail at tennis, the pool table is for the ones who picked up a pool stick at a clubhouse once and proceeded to make it their entire personality, t̶h̶e̶ c̶e̶r̶a̶m̶i̶c̶ s̶t̶u̶d̶i̶o̶ i̶s̶ f̶o̶r̶, the dance studio is for the ones who like ramming into a strangely placed pillar, and f̶u̶e̶l̶z̶o̶n̶e̶ the library cafe is for the ones who supplement actual studying with caffeine runs. The one overlooked but perfectly inclusive space on campus, however, is the infirmary. Here’s why :
1. The infirmary does not discriminate - Cleverly perched deep inside the sports block, it can only be described as an architectural marvel. The beautiful, calming blue contrasts with the white to create an atmosphere that replicates luxury. Armed with an attentive staff, you can enter the infirmary with any problem, and they will know exactly which Dolo 650 to prescribe. If you ever enter with a problem larger than a fever, they teach you the nuances of guess work, and take you on the wondrous journey of playing “this or that” with your sickness. Dengue or typhoid? Pancreatitis or UTI? Bacterial infection or common flu? Find out by experimenting with all the medicines! What a beautiful time to be alive.
2. Their hospitality - If you ever find yourself sick and tired of the experimentation, they will not hesitate to offer you their beds, and in seconds you will find yourself comfortably situated in their ward with an IV drip going into your skin. Congrats! You now have that drip.
3. Their love for their patients - The way to a patient’s heart is through their medicines. And you can tell just how much the infirmary wants to steal your heart. They love you so much that they want to keep you there as long as possible. If you ever find yourself coming close to figuring out the root of your sickness, don't worry! The doctor you’ve so far been interacting with will change shifts with a different one, and you will soon hit ground zero with this new one, and essentially stay in the infirmary forever!
4. They always have a solution - Never hesitate to tell them how you’re feeling - because they always have an injection for it. When in doubt - injection!
5. Their vibes - The absolute best part about the infirmary is its proximity to the World University of Design. Day or night, Monday or Saturday, one can expect WUD to be banging out its rap playlist that never fails to hit the women’s ward. So what if you’re feeling sick and confused and lonely and depressed? Just listen to Drake, and see if 21 can do some for him, or maybe even hit a little rich flex for him.
6. The nightlife - Spending your Thursday nights at THC is so last semester, head to the infirmary instead! The WUD playlists will ensure that you’re having a good time, and when it's time to sleep, you will face only peace and comfort. And if you ever feel the smirnoff making its return, you literally need not worry. You are, after all, in some very capable medical hands!
Finally, they take their ‘tussi na jao’s’ very seriously. When its time for a discharge, you will have to yell at the top of your voice for them to remove the IV from your hand. They love you so much, they never want you to leave. If they remove the IV, how else will you come back? After all, the drip, once gone, can never return. This is why I never really left the infirmary - it's still in me, I still have that drip.
Their passionate cries of persuasion worked its charm on me, and I decided to make it my new home. My physical body might still be seen by you at lib caf, or the mess, but know that my true real spirit lies in the most inclusive space of all. The infirmary really is the best - come see it for yourself, it really does have a space for you!
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